I am sure there are lots of election rules out there, but this is mine. It has been honed over years of experience, just like Nate Silver’s election prediction algorithm.

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Before voting:

Drink sparingly. You want to be able to distinguish the (R)s from the (D)s.

After voting, before returns:

Drink anxiously.

During returns:

Drink.

During returns (for those who need more guidance):

Each time your candidate loses a swing state, switch down to cheaper booze.

Each time your candidate wins a swing state, switch up to tonier booze.

Safety Tip: At no point switch down to isopropyl.

If your candidate loses: Drink sullenly.

If your candidate wins:

Drink indiscriminately.

If there’s a recount: Seriously. Leave the isopropyl alone.