I am sure there are lots of election rules out there, but this is mine. It has been honed over years of experience, just like Nate Silver’s election prediction algorithm.
Drink sparingly. You want to be able to distinguish the (R)s from the (D)s.
After voting, before returns:
During returns (for those who need more guidance):
Each time your candidate loses a swing state, switch down to cheaper booze.
Each time your candidate wins a swing state, switch up to tonier booze.
Safety Tip: At no point switch down to isopropyl.
If your candidate loses: Drink sullenly.
If your candidate wins:
If there’s a recount: Seriously. Leave the isopropyl alone.